A Giant Bag of NOPE – Bleach 680 – The End 2

Uhhhh… so…. yeah…. Bleach 680 is out. Go….uh… yeah….

SPOILERS

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I guess it’s always darkest before the dawn but it’s surprising to me how literally depressed I get after a chapter like this one.  I tend to sit around staring morosely at things for several minutes and then slowly build into a kind of mild pissed-off state.  I’m not ANGRY, but more… grouchy.

So, the things that made me mildly angry in this chapter, in order are:

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Gerard “Miracle” Thor being one-shotted by Yhwach.  As I wrote on Tumblr:

 I mean, I can even with Yhwach’s speech about giving everyone glorious deaths and just walking off into the sunset-WTF– but beyond that I’m mad that, apparently, all the Sternritter’s powers are sucked back into Yhwach…

And… it feels… like a cheat.

I really, really wanted Yumichika to get a chance to use his real shikai to absorb Gerard’s power.  He was on the scene. He was perfectly poised to have a big character moment, where he finally came clean about his Kidou zanpakuto in front of his captain, etc. He was literally the best opponent to fight Gerard, since any time Gerard got hit, he got stronger, and I thought, “Oh you clever bastard Kubo, you’re going to let the ONE GUY who has the ability to take away power face off against the guy who turns power into power…”

But, nope.

Just nope.

So much nope.

Second, this whole f*cking speech from Haschwaldt:

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what kind of stupid-a$$ logic is this, Hashbrown? You’re literally saying “screw your friends, go with the guy who gave you superpowers?”

As anyone who has followed me here on MangaKast knows, I had been really holding out hope for Haschwaldt to be an insider traitor, ala Shindler.  I really, really thought Kubo had been setting this up carefully all along leaving us these subtle hints and….

Yeah, nope.

Nope.

So much nope.

This further irritates me because now, if Haschwaldt does turn traitor, it’s hollow.  He will turn against Yhwach because his power is gone, not because he actually has  brain in his head or actual feelings about anything–nope, it will only be because Yhwach took away his “Balance” toy.

That makes Hachwaldt’s character petty and uninteresting to the extreme.

Nope.

Not okay.

So much nope.

The third thing that pissed me off was this:

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Ywach is going to take himself off somewhere for… reasons.  I am fairly certain those reason are called PLOT COUPONS. This is the single dumbest move any villain has ever done.  I mean, okay, Aizen left the Seireitei and technically gave his opponents time to re-group and prepare for the upcoming battle, but he had a fairly decent reason, which was that he also needed to regroup and build an army.

But Yhwach is saying, “Hey, I’m just going to step over here for awhile and let you guys figure out how to come at me.  You’re not going to win anyway, so I’ll give you a glorious death, okay?”

Oh.

Okay.

Yeah, nope.

Nope.

So much nope.

The next thing that made me kind of grouchy (but much less so than the above) was this:

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Okay, you guys KNOW how much I love Renji.  I am happy that he and Rukia are going to be with Ichigo at the end, but I will admit that I was kind leaning towards wanting to see the dads come to the rescue. I mean, maybe they still will.

But I entirely blame owl-by-daylight for this disappointment, because she posted this beautiful nugget:

Awww maaaaaaan, I was re-reading Bleach 679 and in the comment section someone went: “But what if Ryuuken goes to help Ichigo and Isshin goes to help Ishida?” and now I will be FOREVER DISAPPOINTED because it won’t happen but it would be so unexpected and hilarious if it did.

“I see you are as useless as your father, Kurosaki.”

“NEVER FEAR, URYUU, ICHIGO’S DADDY IS HERE!!!”

 

So… that didn’t happen.

Feeling the Nope here.

The last thing that pissed me off was that bullish*t color page that blacked out the number of chapters left in Bleach.

It made me mad not because I’m shocked to discover Bleach is ending.  We all knew this was coming–or should have–for almost a year now.  It’s more that, because it was highlighted on the very first page, it gave the events of this chapter that much more weight.  It made me think that maybe Kubo is just going to drop the ball, have Yhwach destroy his own army, and in the next several chapters we’ll get some final stupid battle, the END.

This focus made me… doubt Kubo-sensei.  It made me worry that he just had Yhwach rip the rug out from his Sternritter so we can hurry up and rush to an end.

I mean, I was okay with Bleach ending.  I mean, not really OKAY, but I figured that Kubo-sensei would do right by us.

If this goes the way of Naruto I may…

Well.

I may have to live in a blanket fort for the rest of my life.

 

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10 thoughts on “A Giant Bag of NOPE – Bleach 680 – The End 2

  1. So. Just two things to say on this flaming bag of dog shit left outside our door that is Chapter 680. First, I think Kubo forgot who is where and what powers they have because he had too many characters on the field and second, Renji is totally gonna be paste in a few more pages. Sigh.

  2. The really irritating/brilliant part is that Hashwalth is, actually, “the Ichigo” of the Quincies. He had spiritual sense but had no power, which he most desired. We were (frustratingly incorrectly) led to believe that he joined Yhwach and rose to his side as a Shindler, but instead he was just so protective and defensive because he wanted power, the kind that he knows he SHOULD have had back then. And like a shonen villain, he decried friendship over that power. And lost it. If Ryuuken returns Quincy power to him, we’re probably gonna get a brilliant speech about exactly that as he switches sides. No doubt someone who held the mantle of the Almighty knows it’s limitations. (if he ends up dying defending Uryu from an attack, then I will flip a table over how much like Naruto it’s becoming)

    And setting up that moment does not in any way make up for the cheap non-defeat of Gerard, dammit. This was exactly the way I never wanted to see him brought down.

  3. One last kick at this for today before the catalepsy on this subject sets in. I was scrolling through the reddit Bleach threads just now and a thought struck me. If Yhwach is going to attack them in the future, but only when they are at their happiest moment of ever, do you think Ichigo will finally get some romance? And then boom the old man comes for him. Ded. Every teenager’s fear. (Although if Ichigo was 15 when this whole thing started, he’s turning 31 now…) Bring on the doujinshi – I’d so love to see that.

    • Actually what you’re describing sounds dangerous to me. I mean, it’s basically what Naruto fans got. Their ships either confirmed or denied but now all are completely canon The END. It pretty much wrecked that fandom, so I really DO NOT WANT.

      I’m a big fan of lots and lots of ship/romance/sex/smut, but, yeah, no–I don’t want Ichigo to get a canon hook-up. First of all, I think he’s legit ace. (Look, I won’t go into all my theories, but the boy is OBLIVIOUS in a way that Kon and Keigo and Mizuiro aren’t. On top of that, this young 15 year old boy had Rukia in his closet for months and never once tried it on? This is not how I was at 15. At 15 I was dating boys and getting girls to kiss me in the bushes. I was all over the place sexually. If Ichigo isn’t at least a little ace, I do not understand life.) Secondly, once it’s canon, it’s canon. You think ship wars suck now, wait until it’s CONFIRMED that Ichigo and Bambetta are going to set up house in the future and adopt puppies. Think of my epic ByaRen fic! Now trolls can come on and say crap like, “Well, this is nice and everything but Ichigo is canonically STRAIGHT.” Because that’s what’s going to happen. Bleach fandom will get wrecked by the people who will be cutting and pasting images from that last panel to show that their het pairing is canon, and canon is Word of God. Mark my words.

      On a less distressing note, my son Mason just told me that he read that portal as Yhwach headed for the Dangai or possibly the Valley of Screams since both of those exit between the Soul Society and the Human World and Yhwach said he was off to destroy both. If it’s the Dangai he’s headed for then we very well could end up with a time-skip (which would make me ridiculously, stutteringly angry) because it’s already been established in canon that time in the Dangai works differently (hence the aged Ichigo having had years to master the Final Getsuga Tensho.)

      So, despite my greatest fears, we could be headed in that exact direction. Believe me that’s partly why Bleach fandom is completely freaking out today.

      • Huh. The Dangai… Wonder if this will be where we get to see the negative effects of unsanctioned passage. Namely, the ” pop out hundreds/thousands of years away from when you wanted and age into dust”, if I recall correctly. Hopefully not, because that would be a cheap end to what’s supposed to be the final big bad (have him try to destroy Ichigo at his happiest, and ends up dying from time displacement), but this is where one of those Sternritter would be handy to see it happen to.

  4. Dangai has appeared in the reddit convulsing rehash yes. Some interesting thoughts coming up on how that all might be handled. I also wonder how it can be managed well.
    Your epic ‘ByaRen fic’ as you call it, or the ‘Bible’ as we call it, is itself now canon to your readers. Personally I am taking refuge in my favourite yakuza yaoi manga where manly fashionable men think things like “I don’t want to vanish from your gaze.” at each other while driving around doing nefarious deeds. Hah. So great.

    • That fic does sound great. I love that stuff, and I dunno… You’re probably very right about established fic writers, but given the kind of raging arguments people have with me in the comments sections of my fic when I try to tell them that even if they read it on the wiki, no shinigami’s ages have been confirmed or denied, I shudder to think how they’d be about sexuality. We all THINK Kyouraku and Ukitake are 2,000 age because fandom decided that, but we now know that they could be much younger since we ASSUMED they were the graduates from the Academy 2,000 years ago, but have since discovered they were only the first to make captain, which means they could have attended only 500 years ago or whatever. But I randomly made up ages–and made Renji older than Byakuya and OH MY GOD the fights. I’m super fine with people saying, “Meh, that’s not to my taste,” but I get really cranky when people try to pull out canon, because by canon (and if Renji wasn’t exaggerating which OBVIOUSLY HE WAS) he could be two thousand years old, too.

      But I don’t know. If Puppet is right and Yhwach slips into the Dangai and gets lost or something…. ugh. This is why I don’t want a time skip. As much I as i hate this idea I’d almost rather have Renji barrel through after Yhwach right now and drag him back with some shounen speech that goes “This is the happiest moment of my life, asshole! The day you DIE!”

      • That would be utterly fantastic. Renji plus blaze of glory to finally put a stake in the whole damn thing.
        The wonderful poignant yaoi manga is not yet complete and very intense with added disturbing relationships. ‘Twittering Birds Never Fly’ by Yoneda Kou, For the full experience you could read it while listening to Bump of Chicken at the same time. Anyone who would argue with you, of all people, about manga characters’ age, sex or gender has really no clue about Japan I think. I have to go wander off and reread vol. 1 of Bleach again to remember why I liked it in the first place. Enjoy your long weekend!

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